u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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