I'm jealous of your bromance
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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