i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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