I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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