lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
