the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
