I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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