Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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