Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I want a musical about memes.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
