Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
