Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize