You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
