my mouth tastes like poor choices
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize