I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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