Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
