No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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