And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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