I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
