i'm signing you up for texting rehab
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize