so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize