I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
