I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize