based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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