we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
