Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
