Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Randomize