I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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