Sponge bath it is.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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