Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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