It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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