Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
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halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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