i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
