She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Randomize
