So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
this just has baby written all over it
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
