I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
