How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize