I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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