found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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