After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize