just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize