Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
