If i could tip my vagina, i would.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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