i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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