Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
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