It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
We need to rekindle our bromance
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
