She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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