I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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