Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize