Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
