ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
