the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
